Observing Communication

This week assignment was challenging because I work with a great group of woman so I decided to observe communication between and adult and a child. During my observation I will be looking for examples of effective communication and strategies that seem to foster effective communication. I was surprised at what I observed in my first attempt-I saw some very ineffective communication! This was really eye-opening to me and so I included it here along with the effective communication I did observe in my second attempt.

Observation 1:

I observed a mom communicating with her daughter in the parking lot of a grocery store. The daughter was around 15 years old. I noticed when the mother would talk to her daughter she was very loud, and using a lot of cursing words. The daughter would try to say something and she would get cut off and the mother would continue screaming and using vulgar language towards her daughter. From my understanding the daughter was supposedly had stolen out of the store but nothing was found on her. Her mom didn’t believe her she just started in on her verbally abusing her saying, “You keep this up you going to grow up and be just like your older sister in and out of jail.”

I was so shocked at what I was hearing, there was definitely a lot that could have been improved on and changed to make the communication between the mom and her daughter more effective and affirming. Communicating with a child is different than communicating with adult; their speech and body language differs, we have to stop and truly listen to what they are saying (and what they are not saying) to effectively communicate with them. For example, the mother did not give her chance to speak and the store they were at a hair store the owners follow you around as if everyone is a thief. Another thing she could have done in order to communicate more effectively with her was for her to calm down and before accusing her go ask the owner the reason why they thought she may have stolen something and if not talk to her about stealing and the consequences when you display this type of behavior. Putting her down in front of people especially using fowl language really could affect her self-worth

Observation 2:

I observed a teacher and a child communicating on the play ground. I noticed that the teacher seemed very responsive to the child and was focused on the conversation that they were having and the child responded positively:

• Teacher kneld down to student so she was at his level and could make eye-contact

• Teacher addressed student by name, spoke quietly to him, and paused so he could respond. The teacher did not try to fill in the silence or give him words, she waited. At first the pauses were longer but then the child seemed to feel more comfortable and answered quicker.

• The teacher did not outright correct the child, she would repeat what he said correctly and push for further conversation:

This observation had a lot of examples of positive examples in the interaction between the teacher and child. The communication between the two was positive and seemed to be affirming for the child; the teacher truly seemed interested in what the child was saying and the child really seemed to respond to her communication strategies. I liked how the teacher waited for the child to respond, she did not rush him or take control of the conversation. This would be very validating to the child and help him build confidence with his speech and ideas.

I think that the way the teacher communicated with the child would encourage his sense of self-worth. I think that the child would feel that his ideas were important and worth listening to, the teacher was positive and encouraging which probably helped him feel validated and empowered.

Overhearing this communication between the mom and daughter was saddening, but it also reminded me of the importance of what we are learning: we can share what we know! I have received many compliments from my friends, family, and parents on my patience and how well I communicate with my students. Not everyone knows or understands the importance of communicating in an appropriate and positive way with young or children period. As an educator we can share the information we know with them. I have learned a lot from the articles we read this week and I know that there is room for improvement in my communication with young children. One area that I would like especially improve in is my “teacher talk;” I need to remember when I am speaking to my class the context that the child is in and the message that my words and body language are conveying. Listening to the conversation in my second observation between the teacher and child gave me some great ideas on how to communicate effectively and reminded me of the importance of taking the time to listen to the child without interrupting.